not parelli but i'm happy

a few weeks back i applied for a team leader job at work and yesterday i got a letter asking me to go for an assessment for the job, so im like over the moon right now.

i owe it in part to parelli in more ways than one, firstly i suppose i should admit that i used a few parrelli-isms in my application form, i tried to use them appropiately in a way that suited leading people and not horses.

secondly the thing that parelli really helped was to give me the confience to go for the job and to think of myself differently, and really look at what ive done in the past to justify to myself (and now to the company) why i could or should do this job.

at the time i just applied for the job just for the sake of it, and in part to show my team leader that i was capable of doing alot more than just what i do, now i could write about how bad the place is but i'm not going to dwel on it.

but whilst doing the application it got me really thinking about my past jobs, what i have accomplished, and it made me really think about what i am capable of at work, and with horses.

Mounting Practice

right well got some piccys now



had a little practice and then had alittle tölt practice as well which went well, especially since we changed the whole method of asking for it, but we think vinurs starting to get the idea now.



then had a play with chester, which went quite badly at first as he was running into all of the pressure, but after chaning to something different and going back helped, then went back to try another figure of 8 and changed to stand the other side which helped again. did also have a little ride, just in a halter and found him to just bace against all the pressure and i could feel my confidence going a little so i left it on as good a note as i could.

Well had a very nice christmasy weekend away, with real snow !

Anyways its very sad now, as we no longer have liberty and horse and success series, however hopefully they’ll be watched and understood by their temporary new owner. However it does allow us to go through the level 2 and 3 packs properly.

Anyways on to horses now. When in Sweden we had a good go on a more extreme lbi, he was very interesting, as ive ridden him a few times and each time has been different. After a little play up to a riding circuit I had a ride and tried to get a gait however he tensed up immediately and so i left it, he’s just had a new saddle and it really allows him to lift up his back and to put his head and neck down.

It was also nice to see a colt who i last saw as a foal, and he was very nice, unsure of people and quite low ranking as another horse came over and he moved very quickly. But it was lovely to see him again.

Had a few practices getting on vinur, and so that it going well, have found that vinur gets abit unsure if you get on from the offside, (the horse in Sweden did that too), but i think its just not used to it, so we’re doing a fair bit of friendly with it which is certainly helping, but it seams to be more when there is a mounting block (or simmular involved) but getting on from the ground is good – don’t want that to read like that weve only just started this as weve been doing it for ages, but its really only now that we are looking at it differently. Hoping to take a photo or two tomorrow. Providing that we are not snowed in.

taste of things to come

well, today was very interesting, so very unxpected, but like wow.

a number of times ive just taken vinur out to 'hang out' with him, an today was no different, so after a little graze i thought that we'd go in to the school and just have little play.

we starte by doing a circling driving game around a barrel, weve tried it before around a wheel barrow but it din't work well, but it did with the barrel, not suprising really, then we did some really good figure of eight. afterwhich i thought that id set something up so the we could do some sideways, so i took the rope off, just so he coul have some time to himself, i didn't expect him to follow me and be interested in what i was doing.

so after putting a few poles on the floor i was suprised to see him move over to them, a situation i couldn't leave so i asked him to go sideways, my heart was going and i was so affraid of doing anything to upset him and him just disappear, but no he went sideways. we did it both ways over a pole, we then did abit of draw, followed with some backup.

i had decided earlier that id like to have a little ride, so i took the opportunity to have a ride with only a cordeo, althought the steering needs to be improved a little it went very well, we had a little walk roun, then i thought id just ask for something more, and we ended up having a little canter and then we came out of the canter into tölt.

we then spent the last few minutes doing flexions and i sat sideways on him for a short while.

cant wait to see how our relationship and abilities develop in the future, however i wont neglet the fundamentals and i certainly dont want to push what we aren't ready for - as difficult as it will be.

right well the patterns is comming along well

have added a new one where vinur knocks a potnoodle pot over to get a treat, its taking quite a while for him to get starte but then all of a sudden he knows what to do and thats it theres no stopping him.

i spent sometime with our friends horse, whilst he was in and taught it to him and he picked it up alot quicker than vinur, but that just shows how differently horses can learn, or highlights how little they do with him and how much he enjoyed doing something.

had a lovely long hack the other day nothing particular worth mentioning other than having a direction issue over the fields, but it might be due to him having more interest in all of the sheep rather than me leaving the reins on his neck.

that reminds me now riding in horseman reins, with slobbers and with the newer bit, its made such a difference, found hes much happier in the mouth with this bit ans the reins with slobbers mean hes becomming far more sensitive. so am very happy about that.

am now considering going to celebrations, so will spend some time with ticket factory tommorow to find the best seats, would like either block 4, 5, 12 or 13, as these are pretty much in the middle to get the best overall view.

am considering going on a charity ride in the next few weeks with vinur, unfortunately it will all be with non horsemanship peoples so am wondering what they will think to my new reins and different riding style, not to mention the 'little pony' mixed within the big hunter style horses. might be fun to be so diferent, but also very daunting.

have had a few thoughts about emotional fitness, however after reading a few other non parelli things am questioning some of what the parelli's have written, but wont say too mcuh or make up my mind until after tomorrow night.

ooh dear ! so much for writing here more often.

oh well i wont beat myself up over it, at least i write when i can.

so whats new, i've actually started patterns now, rather than progressing through the levels, however am still using levels as a knowledge base.

vinur is loving touch it, everything he can possibly touch he touches, so we've had to up the skill level a bit now and ask him for more before he gets a reward. i've found that it helps if i ask him out loud, specificly to touch something an then ask him, ok in real terms hes not listening to me but is rather picking, up on my concentration on a certain object.

i have also taken the work that sara is doing with lifiting legs and trying to incorperate it into touch this with that leg, with fantastic results, we had touch a cone with one foot, then with his nose. next step might be to touch with other foot.

soon its time to reclip him, and rug him up, so am thinking again how to be soft with clippers and take time, so rather than do it on a week day, will prob do it at the wekkend.

have also been thinking lots about feedback that vinur gives us, i.e. if he had a good time the day before he is extremely easy to catch, however if something 'bad' happens then hes quite ifficult, i.e. the denist oing his teeth. playing about with that and quite enjoying the positive feedback.

its dawned on me how little i write here, i've always got more to say but just dont make the time, thinking that i will always add to it later on and rarely do.

today i'm sure won't be different as ive got to get changed and go to work soon.


well vinur and merrick seam to be getting along very well, its interesting to watch them now that they are more accustomed to one another, merrick is trying a few more dominating games with vinur, and vinur lets him get away with it for a bit then suddenly puts and end to it when hes had enough.

however we are doing more with merrick now, and his confience seams to be building. hes ever so happy for us to touch him, and do little things with him, and quite supprisingly hes very quick to learn porcupine and driving games, or is it that after years of being handled it takes horses alot of time to relearn or respect us a bit more.

tried playing with chester the cob cross the other day, and after alot of friendly on his left hind leg we went and play touch it for the first time, and he loved it, after the first few touch its he was touching everything. such a shame that i dont make more time to play with him as he such a nice horse and seams to appreciate the extra attention. if we did more with him, and and made him abit more clamer and less energetic i'd like to get riing him out again, but he just needs working.

m trying now to go to the yard straight after work and play so perhaps we could each have a horse then soon we can introduce hacking out together again.

right well its time for me to go to work now, as i said i've missed so much out, however now i'm wireless and have a laptop battery, perhaps i can make more use of random moments when iäm not doing much.

not much this week

well i'm now getting alot more adjusted to nights, and now feel like i have a bit of energy to do things.

have started to sort out alot of the ex's stuff in the garage - wells its been 3 years and after voicing it several times she has not come to collect it all. its sad in some ways because i know this stuff has memories in it for her but if she doesn't want it what can i do ? i have decided to keep some of the really special stuff and send it to her brother at some point, just to take some of the guilt away from me. however on a more positive note i'm really happy that its all going, i am sorting things to go to charity and recyling what i can - again just to make me feel alot happier.

its strange to see photos of this person who took me to the worst point in my life, after everything i think that i am really starting to let go of things now, if i see a photo all i can see is a person who i don't know - dunno if that makes sense, perhaps i thought that i knew her, however after everything that happened her true self came out and the person i thought i knew just disappeared.

oh well i can't say that i'm unhappy about it all as it lead me to meet sara, so i'm very happy about it in some respects.

again as i said earlier haven't done much with vinur this week, but we clipped him a week ago, for the third time in his life, the first time he was clipped he was very unsure and just let us do it, last year he wasn't happy about it, but this year it went extremely well.

we did lots of friendly with the clippers then did lots with the clippers on, and then slowly clipped him and retreated when he need us to. we started with the areas where he would be most happy with us clipping so his shoulders and neck (didn't do a full clip just the underside of the neck to his chest) then very slowly clipped his chest, he wasn't sure about this so i stopped and did lots of friendly and then back to friendly with clippers on.

it was a big thing for him as we got lots of chewing and we did what we could to reward him with lots of carrots, scratches and just nothing.

i think that we have hopefully set ourselves up for success for when we need to clip him again.

as for the rest of the week i did very little due to me being dead, however yesturday after a very normal horse car boot ( where i sold an old halter and rope before even getting it out of the car) we have introduced the yard owners 1 and abit colt in to vinurs field. the colt took alot of time to catch and to lead out the field (very little interaction with humans - something we hope to work on a little) and we introduced the two together we watched for quite some time vinur and this colt meet properly in a field and not over a fence. so now all fingers crossed that these two get on and vinur can help the colt with his insecure feelings.

right well i´m back after my hols and lots has happened since then

we went to sweden to go on a course by Eyjólfur one of the the horse masters of iceland, and his lessons were very interesting, i very much like how although he works soley with icelandics, he isn´t closed minded and shuts off everything and everyone who is slightly different.

it was interesting how principles and techniques used with cutting horses can be used with icelandics.

something that i was quite humbled by was that i went out for a ride and Eyjólfur said that he was impressed that I was riding in just a halter.

i also had a lesson with lollo and found it to be very interesting, i rode a horse called totte, it was an excellent lesson as i got to try not only the pure clean gait of an icelandic but i was also able to disturb the gait so that i could feel how different gaits can start to develop in the gait that you are in. i.e. how you can have a pacey tölt. i´ve since had a play with vinur with this new knowledge and could feel how it was wrong - however as he was out of training it was very difficult to infulence him back into a clean gait.

i can certainly understand how gaited horses are considered to be on a different level to dressage horses. i also think that it is weird and fantastic how such a complicated horse can be used just for hacking and their real abilities never used. in my terms it would be like having a 3 day eventer and just going round the local lanes. but it fantastic that these little horses have such ability and potential and aren´t focused on one particular aspect with the rider and horse becomming highly strung.

it was also nice as lollo commented on my seat and my feel of the gait, so i am now quite happy because ive not had a propper lesson for years and never on this type of horse.

oh i almost fogot to write that i had a good go at flying pace, which was like really good, felt like my innerds were being re-arranged but was really good, again comming back to the different league of horse it amazes me how you have to give little adjustment aids to adjust the gait to make it pure.



right now since i had´ve been back i have got to moan. the apprentice professional predator has just changed bit again. she has a 4 or 5 year old very green horse and only had him less than a year and shes changed bits (that i know of ) 3 times since she got him. it pains me to think about him and how she´s is going to destroy him. i can´t watch and try to avoid them as much as possible. dont know what breed he is but he has got the ability to do a very very very bad pace, obviously pace is two beat like trot and so this little lad is going into this bad pace and the girl thinks that its trot and is trying to rise to it.

well maries playday went really well

did a fair bit of friendly game around his hind quarters and spent a good amount of time loading and unloading him.

upon unloading him I asked him to come down one step at a time and he did this really well gave plenty of time for him to think and become comfortable.

vinur is also becoming happier at travelling, he's licking and chewing alot more now when we are moving, however when the road gets bumpy he freezes up. planning to get and fit a camera soon so that I can see what hes doing as i'm driving (obviously as and when its safe to do so) .

when i drove charlie he would almost never crash into the sides whereas vinur did it alot, but he's learning to be more stable in the back, but it still scares me from time to time. am trying to think abut how i make it easier for him but its more down to him rather than my driving style.

well recentlky have been riding a young driving horse as well as vinur, tis good to see the two horses interact as they both try to use the same domination tactics on each other.

progressing with things well, unfortunately little time to write in blog

doing plently of zone 5 work.

did give him a bath recently and although he wasnt too happy, he didn't hate it as much as he has done, and i think towards the end he was almost starting to like it.

having a few problems with itchyness in mane and tail so am abit worried about that, but have a few ideas. to help.

hoping to have a good time at maries this weekend,

right i know that i need to write about sweden and i will soon, but i wanted to write about some things since then.

have watched a dvd called visible horse and found that to be very interesting and has made me think about a few things, i now stand back and look at vinur in a differetn way now.

another was pilataes for riders, with was extremely difficult and damn near killed me but hopefully with time and practice ill be able to do more than just the warm up.

have spent a lot of time finisheing off my trailer for its sale and so havent done much with vinur but i did playu with him yesturday, made a ring out of a rope and whilst crouched i attempted to put him in it. took a while but we managed to get about there (had 3 out of 4 hooves) gave him lots of thinking time, which helped, also worked on standing on a piece of wood (just back feet), but it became very difficult for him so i was happy with him just standing very close to it.

despreatly looking forward to teh horsenality / personality report to re-do vinurs horsenality and use this new material to look at things in a new light.

am hopeing to spend a session of more extreme friendly game with vinur to hopefully help him become a little happier with zones 4 / 5

Playday

on sunday we went to Maries playday and Vinur did soo well. we've done the games for quite some time now, and although we have just gone to a 22 foot line, i think that he was getting very bored, or didn't see the point, but on sunday everything came together brilliantly, in a way i never expected.

after getting to the play day we were a bit unsure with what to do, as we have never tried using obsticals. after trying a few simplar ones, we went over to a pedestal and i asked vinur to mount it, and he did.

thought that i'd leave it at that, but it dawned on me that he either had to get off frontwards or backwards, whilst i was thinking about it, he started to move forwards

suddenly a though got in my mind, perhaps a stupid thought, and so i asked again but this time asked for all four feet on the pedestal, there was no pressure, and if he didn't want to then fine, but i think he kinda enjoyed it and gave us all four feet.









it was like the best thing ever. i'm hoping that he was realising a purpose behind the horsemanship, and we think that he enjoyed being on the pedestal as he didn't want to get off.

bit quicker as i'm waffling on abit, we also played with the car wash, a table cross country jump, and a few other bits and pieces.

we later he a little competition style game which we both thouroughly enjoyed, i had a little problem with throwing the rope over vinurs head, on the weave, but we didn't do too badly. later somebody (sorry i can't remember her name) showed me how to do tie the rope back onto the halter to make some reins.




over all it was a fantastic day, and we are looking forward to clive and jane's playday and any other ones that we can get to, as it has really inspired us.

Motivation

Well its hardly been an hour or two since Bryan spoke about motivation and although it hasn't sunk in yet it has struck alot of chords, and right now I'm feeling very empowered so thought id right stuff down so that later on i can read back and re empower myself, might think twice later about saying somethings as they are just coming out, so i hope that you can make sense of things.

I think that i have a few problems, the biggest is being able to evaluate myself,

so lets start.

So when Bryan said think, i could not think about anything, everything but think about the task at hand. i was desperately trying to think about what i was unhappy about, and it dawned on me, that it was that. i didn't like thinking about myself.

PAIN :

• Admitting to myself the blame that i place upon myself, of which there is alot. should i have done this, feeling bad that i didn't do thats, or i should have done this. i wouldn't call it regrets but i would definitely say beating myself up, and paying enough attention and making the changes.
• Fear of having to improve, or the fear of working to improve. perhaps this is more laziness or I'm just used to following my old patterns.
• Failure. A biggy this one, i often think that I'm so afraid of failure i don't push myself or try many new things outside my comfort zone. a good example of this was when i spoke about independent seat, the first thing i said was about not being sure if i had done this right, i knew that i had (in my opinion, yes i could have put more depth into it, but i wanted to cover as much very quickly), but back to my point i was perhaps setting myself up for failure, the thing that I'm most afraid of, and later at the end wasn't able to actually converse with people about my feeling that an independent seat wasn't a finite and could always be improved on, and so perhaps never truely achieved. - maybe a bit of a rant but that's been bothering me alot.

PLEASURE:

• Not Worrying. I'm thinking that the saying ignorance is bliss applies perfectly to thins.
• Easy Life. not having to make hard conscious efforts to change.

Threshold Pain:

• Lack of Happiness. This is a main factor, so until something really bothers me, it could get left. tidying the garage is a good example, it needs to be done, quite desperately but i haven't started, all i do is curse myself for not doing it, even a little often would help but no.
• Plays on my mind. Perhaps another way of describing lack of happiness.
• a deadline. a real motivator for me, ok I'm not last minute but i am towards the end, like i could have had the garage done a few weeks ago, but it will get done now due to Sara's parents coming over.

Long term happiness

• To admit my faults properly and to work on them I'd definitely have:

1. more inner happiness
2. more motivation
3. much more time
4. more fulfilment
5. more confidence
6. perhaps more success.

ok, i realise that theres is alot there, worded poorly but it makes some sense to me. i think that to actually evaluate myself i could work on the niggly things which would over time make a big difference.

now i could go into lots of details but I'm trying not to be an 'oh no'. so, what can i do ?

right now I'm thinking look at the trees and not the wood. just think about little things, like why i did something specific, and as i do more and more, and make little changes then hopefully ill ask more questions about the bigger picture, and as little things get changed then things will slot into place in the bigger picture.

right well I'm going to leave it at that for now, as I'm sure most of it has turned into the rambles of a very tired person.

so thank you Max, Bryan, and the rest of the group, recently you have all made me realise alot of things, and are affecting me in a very big way.

Things getting on top

well today I was finally able to play with vinur (due to circumstance), and when playing it made me realise how wound up i was and has since made me realise just how much has been getting on top of me, - won't be too much oh no, buts its good for me to vent things so heres a quick list :

1. fed up of the boring, tedious place that i work, where nobody will use common sense to make things easier for everybody, along with the low wages, and ammount of overtime that i'm doing.
2. stress caused by an insurance company which has taken three weeks to get near to a conclusion.
3. annoyance over trying to do something on the horse box, and the lights stop working completely, then to realise today that after i have started to re wire the lights that it was quite probibly a fuse.
4. fathers day.

now to turn just those particular oh nos into oh yeses.

1. at least i have a job, and i have just had some training.
2. will be getting a big sorry from the company
3. at least now the lights will work properly, and i can have faith in them - plus i also enjoy fiddly things, that annoy me and there will be alot of satisfaction when its done.
4. fathers day will soon be gone for another year.

right that my moaning over, looking forward to maries play day on sunday - think it will help me to undwind alot.

planning to have a good session with vinur on friday and the meeting in the evening. home work is comming on well, as long as i'm not pressurised for a quick fast sudden answer i can give a correct answer.

am also looking forward to working evenings next week as i can have a nice early morning ride with vinur (without the mrs nagging me :P)

Vinur

Since the last post our all of us have really been getting into the swing of only having one horse, it is kinda weird having to work around each other, but were getting along fine.

I took Vinur out for a ride the first time ever, Sara has usually been with me on another horse. We did a little friendly, followed by a few other games, heres a photo

We decided to turn left, then suddenly out of nowhere a huge massive tractor with horse eating equipment jumped out of nowhere, Vinur looked, then chewed, and didn’t care as it drove past. He wasn’t sure about a pond straight behind a hedge but with a little encouragement he was fine. After 5 minutes we turned and Vinur, wanting to go went into tölta, so I slowed him we walked then he tried again to tölta.

The rest of the time Sara played with Vinur as I’m working hard on our trailer to get it finished to sell, but I have done little bits here and there with him, but nothing special.

Over the weekend we gave him a good brush and then a bath. I’m only ever used to a horse who loves baths, so I just went along with things, it took Vinur a few moments to relax but he was fine, he wasn’t too happy with water in the beginning of zone once, but with a little retreat and then move very slowly he was allot happier, he was also unsure about his sheath and under the tail being washed, but a little retreat and then slow approach we did what was needed. Photo

I then helped the yard owner setup a caravan awning, Sara and Vinur were stood about 3 metre away and he wasn’t at all bothered when it jumped up and walked over to the caravan. I also forgot to mention that when we were giving Vinur a bath the yard owner drove past twice in his tractor with bales of hay, and although me and Sara stood back ( think we are too used to Charlie) Vinur didn’t care one iota.

and that leads me onto my conclusion, as I’m doing more with Vinur I am finding myself to be so much calmer and relaxed, I don’t have to be on guard for trailers or re-think doing things, Vinur’s energy is so much lower and he goes into a new situation with a calmer more positive energy, if something happens you can work through it rather than just spin and run (obviously a slight exaggeration). But I find Vinur so much easier and willing to work with, whereas with Charlie it was always some sort of dominance game going on, we could never just have fun.

A Brief History of Charlie and Me.

Well it is almost 5 years ago since I got Charlie, my first horse who was sold as a small competition horse. Perhaps with my lack of real riding experience and him being a thoroughbred maybe not a good combination but we got along well.

We had a number of problems during the first winter, such as feeding him too much mix and nuts, he had so much energy, but after learning about feeding correctly he soon calmed down. Through lack of knowledge I just copied the tack which the previous owner had, so flash nose band and martingale. So as Charlie calmed the noseband and martingale came off, and boy was he a different horse because of it.

We spent a lot of time jumping things over the first winter and I played with him loose in the school.

Anyways in the first spring we moved to a dressage yard, and he had a massive field but the yard owner had lots of rules, which didn’t benefit us at all well. Everything had to be done at the same time to every horse, so they all went out at the same time and came in at the same time, all the horses ended up waiting by the gates, same with feeding and this brought out many more vices from Charlie, but there wasn’t much I could do as you needed permission to ride which was rarely given, and should you want to ride during the day the yard owner had to be asked as she had the only key.

As you can guess we didn’t stay long, but it wasn’t all bad as she introduced me to Monty Roberts.

From the dressage yard we went to a DIY yard where there were a few serious jumpers with the odd dressage person, but generally people hacked. and it proved to be a good mix, so we just ended up disappearing for an hour or two every few days into the lanes. It was a shame to leave but a lady was moving to a yard which was much closer to home and they had far more hacking roads.

The first hack I went on was for three hours, and a carriage was in group. It was a much smaller yard so everybody knew each other better, which suited me.

I then met Sara and went on a few courses with Eyjolfur Ísolfsson, who got me really thinking about horsemanship, Sara had done little bits which we tried with the horses, but as soon as there was a problem or the horse could do it lack of knowledge stopped us.

So we took a deep breath and bought a Parelli Pack, we didn’t watch it immediately; we saved it for a week’s holiday when we were in Sweden so we could study it properly. Then when we got back that was it, we went full steam into our horses, ok they developed at different speeds, Charlie took a long time to give sideways but everything else went well, especially the undemanding time, within 5 minutes he was stood over me, smelling and nuzzling everything.

The only negative part of Parelli is that it showed Charlie’s dominant side, which we never fully dealt with, nor ever would as he would always take the game to a new level.

I had lots of plans prior to the sale to Charlie, we wanted to do a video for official assessment and for me to keep, and however by the time we were what I felt ready time was running out. We tried but it wasn’t going to happen, so rather than letting the last days be a fight and us both get nowhere we just had a few hacks.

It was upsetting for Charlie to go especially the last week, but I look back over our time together and smile, my last aim was for us to be partners, but I’m happy with us finishing as good friends.

There’s times when we cried, like when he grazed his leg for the first time and there were thoughts of calling the vet, and times when I laughed like when we galloped through a massive field and did some jumps.

I will miss him terribly, but he’s got a good home with a new herd, and I know he’ll be happy with them.

Right new blogg, so i've decided to start over again, starting to replying to the Heart and Desire Question.

Because Charlie and I are parting ways I will leave him out of this and write about Vinur.

What my Horse and I are doing now.
We are currently re-introducing the games, and starting to do more hacks, which we hope to start lengthening the time at which we are riding.

Where are we in the program / Progress
We are somewhere in level 2 online, I have just gone through a self assessment for us - CLICKY HERE
Red is haven't started
Yellow is making progress
Green is can do and perfecting.
To be honest now that i've just done that i didn't realise how much we had done together.

Relationship
Our relationship is getting better all the time as he is becoming more trusting and wants to be with me more.

Now last year we were pre Parelli, however were using a few Swedish horsemanship ideas, but with now structure we didn't get anywherewith it. relationship wise well he didn't trust me much and things were abit of a struggle (i.e. in picking up his feet), he got better comming towards me in the field but he really didn't want to know me. I also realise now that i pushed him through things too much, with too much pressure.